The question on everyone’s mind right now is when will we be able to get rid of Covid-19 pandemic. The answer to this is not simple and there is a lot of uncertainty regarding the cure. The internet is full of information regarding Covid-19 virus, how it spreads, its symptoms and precautions we need to take to save yourselves. Amongst all this discussion, we are forgetting the psychological and emotional impact of this novel virus. As much as physical health, our mental health is equally important. We have to be mentally ready to deal with Covid-19’s impact.
So, lets start by understanding why there is a need for isolating ourselves and its effect on our emotional state.
Why are we isolating?
If you are still unable to understand the reason behind ‘Social/Physical Isolating’ then may God save you! We are not hiding nor we are fearful. We are doing this for others, for our communities, there are others i.e. kids, elderly people, individuals with weak immune systems who are at risk. By isolating, we are ensuring that the growth of Covid-19 slows down, this is the only active strategy we can employ at this hour. When we think for the community, the community will also think for us.
What are the effects of isolating during Covid-19 pandemic?
Aristotle said “Man is by nature a social animal”. Social connections not only help us in our growth but also keeps us sane. Clifford Singer, in one of his research correlates the affect of isolation to health and mortality. The most common effects of isolation seen is people during COVID-19 are:
- Loss of routine
- Anxiety
- Low self-esteem
- Disconnectedness
- Loneliness
- Fear of losing
- Lack of motivation
- Irritability
- Severe mood swings
- Overthinking
How To Manage Your Mental health During COVID 19 Quarantine?
I attended an online course on ‘Managing Your Mental Health During Covid’ on Coursera by Professor Steve Joordens who teaches Introductory Psychology at University of Toronto. It was a very well-designed course which delves into the psychological impact of Covid-19. I am sharing with you some pointers from this course and some from my personal experiences in life.
You might also like to listen to my interview that I did for Sana Grover, a famous Lifestyle Influencer from Delhi.
1. Mindful Distractions
What makes you happy? Singing, dancing, social networking, reading, cooking, writing? Or is it smoking, drinking, harassing others, trolling? There are always two ways of dealing with things – adaptive and maladaptive. Choose the one that ensures your well-being. Immerse yourself in activities that gives you happiness, it does not matter how small it is or even if you are not good at it. I am doing art these days and I m no genius in it. My work is not neat, but I thoroughly enjoy the process of drawing, colouring, stitching, DIY and doodling. I am doing it for myself and for Instagram 😉
The point being that do something that engages your energies in a positive and productive way. Doing things that are self-harming and to others is such a waste of life. I am sure, we all can do better for ourselves.
2.Guided Relaxation
One of the tried and tested way to deal with stress is Guided Relaxation Technique. It encourages positivity and teaches you to control your bodily reactions to stress. Psychologist Steve Joordens, say that to know how to relax, one needs to know what relaxation feels like. He gives a very interesting analogy by comparing the process of beaming used in Star Trek to relaxation state. He reinforces this by saying that when one is beamed to a location in Star trek, they need to know the location of that place, similarly to relax, one needs to know how relaxed you want to be and how it feels to relax. According to him, guided relaxation is a skill which needs to be developed. It will help you in dealing with anxiety and your emotions.
3.Well Balanced Sleep Pattern
Rest is essential for dealing with daily life stressors. When your body is well-rested, you are in a better position to deal with anxiety of Covid-19. many people are complaining about disturbed sleep patterns, now the reason behind it is that our Sympathetic nerves [fight/flight mechanism] are active due to the chronic stressor i.e. Covid-19 in our environment, these nerves readies us for emergencies and actue stressors that needs immediate action. But because of the chronic nature of Covid-19, we are unable to take an action to deal with it, so our systems are always geared up to do something. It makes us energised, active, hyper and affects our digestion, increases heart beat and causes dryness in our throat.
All this energy makes it difficult for a person to sleep. You need to be relaxed in order to able to sleep comfortably. It is also important to keep in mind, that we are doing limited physical activity these days, we are not tired and that may be one of the reason for disturbed sleeping pattern. Include physical activity in your routine and avoid sleeping in the afternoon to ensure you sleep well.
4.Healthy Eating Habits
Worried about putting on weight during Covid-19? So are all of us! Eat healthy but don’t diet. Try to include healthier options in your diet instead of thinking about going on a strict diet. Set realistic goals, of course we are all eating much more than regular days due to stress and time on our hand. Sometimes, when I am bored I go to the kitchen to see what I can eat that time. So obviously, my weight is definitely going up. To counter the weight gain, you can start exercising as mentioned on the 13th point.
5.Achieve Something
The sense of achieving something enhances our self esteem and self efficacy. As Humanistic psychologist says the all our behaviours are goal directed and purposeful. The sense of achievement and one’s ability to realise their potential is the sole aim of our lives.
There are so many online courses, DIY sessions, discussions/debates and capacity building workshops taking place on the internet that one could choose from. I have been recycling things at home and turning them into decor pieces, baking cakes, mastering recipes and studying courses related to my subject. It did help me to deal with stress.
6.Emotional Connection
The need of the hour is to physically distance ourselves but connect socially and emotionally with others. Spend quality time with yourself and your loved ones. Talk to people on G+ Hangout or fix up a date on Zoom. Connecting with others emotionally means that you maintain a deeper bonding and understanding with them, messaging on social media does not count as maintaining emotional connection. During these difficult times, hearing someone’s voice or seeing a loved one on webcam can be healing.
Now is the right time to show that you care for others and you have all the time too to reconnect and develop social closeness.
But for some of us, showing emotional closeness can be very difficult. Like I do not call people, like hardly ever, unless its work related. That does not mean that I don’t care, I do, it is just that I feel it is futile talking about mundane things.And, for me it is emotionally draining to talk. I really need to work on it. Trust me, I am trying in vain. The point is, people won’t change overnight, someone who doesn’t like talking over the phone, will suddenly not be calling you everyday to show that they care. But please remember that you are in their thoughts and are loved.
7.Need For Structure
Having a routine during quarantine is very crucial for your well-being and mental health. Follow your regular routine or make up new ones. Wake-up and sleep at a specific time and take your meals at a scheduled hour, at least on weekdays.
I have started making my bed, feeding the birds and watering the plants in the morning. Starting the day with doing something positive sets the tone for the day. I consciously divide my time between cooking, cleaning, Netflix, online courses, art and spending it with my partner. Having a routine makes us feel that we are in control, reduces stress levels and aid us with dealing with the changes we all are facing during Covid-19.
8.Budget Your NEWS Consumption
Do not spend your time watching News throughout the day. Cap your consumption of News and make sure you do not watch it first thing in the morning and the last thing before you go off to sleep. News channels are blabbering the same information again and again in a sensationalist way which can make your anxiety race. Have a ‘Pallette Cleasner’ after you watch the News, something that will lighten your mood like watching comedy videos or listen to you favourite music. News do not have an immediate impact on you, so even if you watch it the next day or after sometime, the world is still going to be same. Be informed but not over-informed with negative information.
Watching News can also be addictive, in the times of Covid 19 when we all are unsure about what is going on and how things are going to be in the future. The information that we get from News channels scares our brain, but our brains are not tuned to unpredictable information. So we are always hungry for more information because its rewarding in a way. The sudden flow of information that comes randomly to us makes watching News addictive. Just like in addiction the rewards are random and people repeat the same behaviour again and again in order to be rewarded. For example, addiction of social media or gambling.
9.Focus on small goals
Setting short term and realistic goals ensures achievement of a task as it minimises procrastination. When the short term goals are achieved it gives a sense of achievement which motivates you to work towards your long term goals. We should have a Long term Vision but several Short Term Goals to achieve success. Very step is a step towards your vision, its like climbing a ladder one step at a time to reach to your desired goal.
10.Share Chores
This goes out for anyone and everyone who is sharing space with others. It is important that we share chores in the house, designate work and stick to it. You can not expect your mother, wife, husbands or grandparents to do fend for you. Share work responsibilities according to your abilities, even the smallest of help around the house can make a big difference.
Doulos and I shares chores in the house, I do the cooking and he washes the utensils. He mops the floor and I wash the clothes. Let us not be tied down with gender roles and age old traditional division of work. Also, when you share work load at home, it enhances familial bonds and closeness amongst family members.
11.Accept your feelings
It is OKAY to feel sad and upset. When everyone around you is focusing on staying Positive, feeling negative emotions may seem odd. There is nothing wrong with feeling what you are feeling right now. Embrace your emotions and deal with them effectively by following the below-mentioned pointers:
- Identify your emotion
- Accept your emotions
- Reflect on why are you feeling that emotion
- Is the reason related to Quarantine or is it some deep emotional issue that you have been harbouring for long?
- Seek help from others, if required
- Focus on the present
- Be strong
A few days back, while working in the kitchen I started crying. I knowingly picked up an argument with Doulos. The frustration of staying at home and not being able to do things freely finally got me. I was not annoyed with my partner but with the circumstances in which we all are living. It took me a while to realise the reason of my frustration and since then I have maintained my calm and focusing on redirecting my emotions towards things that I can control in my life.
12. Include exercise into your routine
Research has proven time and again that exercising is the best way to deal with stressors in our lives. Exercising releases endorphins which enhances one’s mood and relieve any kind of physical tension from your body. A routine of 40 minutes four times a week is a good start for beginners. Once you start with Yoga or any other form of physical exercise, you will see the change in your body and mood within a month.
13. Communicate your needs
It is a difficult time for those staying in families with an underlying conflict. There is no where to escape and staying 24/7 in close proximity can definitely affects one’s well being. In such a situation, it is always better to communicate your needs to your family. Every week you can have a family meeting where each one can state their expectations and collectively everyone can suggest a solution. Respecting boundaries and giving each other space are the two most common issues faced by families during this pandemic.
14. It is okay not to do anything
We are not on vacation! You don’t need to set an agenda for this break. We all deal differently with crisis, some of us are passive copers whereas others are active copers. I am sure the pictures you are seeing on social media of people posting about their culinary skills, art work, online courses, gardening and crafting is making you feel that you are not doing enough. But it is OKAY not to do anything, you are coping (in your own way) which is more than enough. Don’t let other people’s lives affect you in a negative way. Do not compare yourself with others instead focus on the things that you are doing, focus on your positives.
Here is a list of travel shows that you can binge watch during quarantine:
Or listen to this curated playlist:
During these difficult times of Covid-19 pandemic, we need to be empathetic and understanding towards ourselves and towards others. Do not be too harsh on yourself if you are unable to reach your goals instead focus on the things that you are able to do. We all cope differently, the strategies that works for me might not work for you. And, its okay when that happens! Be mindful and take care of yourself and your loved ones. This shall Pass…